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Happiness is for all…

Written by Daniel Otero

…but happiness isnt in a bottle

 

By: Daniel Otero

 

In truth, happiness is for everybody; however, 80 percent of the people decide to remain victims of their own past and themselves.

 

I love the song, “Love potion number 9”. But in this case, Madame Ruth isn’t the gypsy at the corner to cure all your problems with one swig of the bottle.

 

Happiness like everything in life has to be honed. It’s a skill which has to be learned, if you didn’t learn it as a child. You can’t take a sip off a drink and voila, instant happiness/gratification! And troubles are all gone!

 

Sadly, that’s why we have so many people with mental illness, alcoholics and drug-addicts throughout the world. Searching for the elusive-magical ‘pill’ to feel complete. If it could be that easy!

 

For this reason, my beloved country, the United States has 20 percent of its population ‘pill-popping’ to find instant gratification.

 

However, life doesn’t work that way.

 

Life is more about survival, learning to deal with problems, reality and solving them all by yourself.

 

I mean, we can search for advice and help; but all the answers are usually within ourselves.

 

Trust me, I lived to learn this simple truth, “Nobody can make you happy but yourself!”

 

After reading Dale Carnegie for over a quarter-of-a-century. In his philosophy of life, he dictated two-unique truths: live one day at a time and it’s all about your attitude.

 

It’s better to smile than to frown. You need 86 muscles in the face to frown, while you only need 14 to smile.

 

Coming from the tough streets of Brooklyn, New York; to survive you had to grow-up mean.

 

It didn’t matter how much positive reinforcement one received from their parents. It wasn’t only about changing places. It stemmed from modifying behaviors.

 

Because anywhere we go, we still have to take ourselves.

 

People get into relationships to feel happy. Sorry folks, other people can’t make you happy! It just doesn’t work.

 

When we get into any relationship, we all bring our amount of ‘baggage’ to the table. Whether it’s family or ourselves.

 

So, how can we change, what’s the secret formula to stop being unhappy or a worrier?

 

First step is, ‘fake it till you make it’. Become a good actor. Learn to smile and tell yourself everything is great. All is going to be fine.

 

Whether you’re healthy or sick…

 

Say hello to everybody, even if others don’t greet you back.

 

Don’t allow others to take your happiness away. There’s plenty of misery out there. Guard your contentment like a treasure!

 

When you’re worried, ask yourself always, “What’s the worse that can happen?”

 

Analyze your circumstances and write them down. It’s truly therapeutic.

 

Practice the above for three months and see how it feels in the long run.

 

“What do you have to lose?”

 

You see, with societies’ prosperity and all this technology, I find myself around extremely-miserable personalities. Especially those whom are lonely.

 

Why does this happen? Eighty percent of the unhappiness in the world isn’t inflicted by outside sources. Usually, it’s done by ourselves. It’s the honest truth.

 

Forgive your enemies and don’t hate others. It’s more consuming to dislike than to love those whom have wronged you!

 

Typically, it isn’t a health, but an attitude issue.

 

We have all suffered in one form or another.

 

I can blame it all on my spouse, family, parents, work, the boss, life, combat, the tough-streets of Brooklyn, Africa or the Middle East.

 

However, I’m a grown man and life is tough for most of us.

 

Therefore, all of us have to work our hardest to be happy.

 

Little by little, learn to be happy and let go of half of your troubles and bitterness; before unhappiness, worries and illness consume you!

About the author

Daniel Otero

A New Yorker who has been living in China for the past nine years. He's a freelance writer and ESL teacher.

Former member of the military with extensive travel and living experiences throughout different countries.

Lover of life, good food, travel, writing and dealing with social issues.